Tag Archives: writing

What Was Your Handle?

I’m not talking about a doorknob. I’m talking about the name you had when talking on a CB radio. Back in the 70s when I was a kid, most everyone had a CB Radio including my own parents. It was what they called a cultural phenomenon. I guess cell phones are a cultural phenomenon today. The greatest part was that once you paid for the radio, that was it, there were no monthly costs and you didn’t have to worry about running out of a signal. 

I used to beg my daddy to let me talk on their radio. You could just hear all the truckers and other listeners rolling their eyes and then probably changing channels. There were all kinds of terms, kind of like our acronyms today, only cooler. You could say something like “What’s your 20? There’s a smoky at the chicken coop, so you better not lay your hammer down.” In other words, “what’s your location? There’s a police officer at the weigh station so don’t go fast.” Isn’t that the coolest? So much better than SMH, IDK or IYKYK. Mostly, I would just say, Breaker, Breaker, One Nine, which is a request to break into a channel or 10-4 good buddy (yes, friend ) and then I would giggle. My handle was Kitten, a name my Aunt Sue gave me. 

Being a southerner in the 70s meant you probably watched Smokey and the Bandit. There was a lot of talking on the CB radio in that movie. For example, Cledus “The Snowman” Snow, (a truck driver) said, “You got the Snowman, I’m east bound and down,” which means this is Cledus Snowman and I’m driving fast with the accelerator pedal pressed all the way to the floor.” How could you not like that movie? The smokey (policeman) was Buford T. Justice and the bandit (law breaker) was Burt Reynolds. I don’t remember much about the movie except that the Smokey chased the bandit and Carrie, the hitchhiker (Sally Field) from Texas to Georgia in a Trans-Am and something about beer. Everyone cheered for the bandit and the Smokey was a buffoon. 

Songs (about CB Radios) were very popular as well. Of course, East Bound and Down, by Jerry Reed, from the movie Smokey and the Bandit was great. 

‘East bound and down, loaded up and truckin’
We gonna do what they say can’t be done
We’ve got a long way to go and a short time to get there
I’m east bound, just watch ol’ Bandit run’

 

Remember Convoy by C.W. McCall? It had CB Jargon, talking AND singing. It was gold! 

Yeah breaker one nine this here’s the Rubber Duck
Uh, you got a copy on me Pig Pen C’mon
Uh yeah Ten-Four Pig Pen fer sure fer sure.
By golly it’s clean clear to Flag Town, C’mon
Yeah its a big Ten -Four there Pig Pen
Yeah we definitely got the front door, good buddy
Mercy Sakes Alive looks like we’ve got us a convoy

And then the chorus…

Cause we got a little ol’ convoy
Rockin’ through the night
Yeah, we got a little ol’ convoy
Ain’t she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain’t nothin’ gonna get in our way
We gonna roll this truckin’ convoy
‘Cross the USAAAAAAA
Convoy!

I bet you’re singing it in your head. Ha Ha! I remember convoys back in the 70s on the interstate. I never knew why the trucks were all bunched up but there was usually a good reason.

Of course, we all cried to Red Sovine’s, “Teddy Bear” song, a country classic about a disabled young boy who spends his days talking to truck drivers on his late father’s CB radio, striking up a special bond with a trucker known as “Red.” Teddy Bear tells Red how hard it is for his mom since his dad died. Red asked Teddy Bear for his address and asked his trucker friends for help.

We took up a collection for him before his mama got home

And each driver said goodbye and then they were all gone.

He shook my hand with a mile-long grin

And said, “So long, trucker, I’ll catch you again!”

I hit that interstate with tears in my eyes

And I turned on the radio and I got another surprise.

“Breaker, one-nine,” came a voice on the air,

“Just one word of thanks from Mama Teddy Bear.

We wish each and every one a special prayer for you

‘Cause you just made my little boy’s dream come true.

I’ll sign off now before I start to cry.

May God ride with you.  Ten-four, and goodbye.

We were all crying because back then you didn’t worry about pedophiles and giving out your address. 

Phantom 309 was also a Red Sovine song. It was about a ghost driving an 18-wheeler. A hitchhiker gets picked up by Joe, who drives a truck called Phantom 309. Joe drops the hitchhiker off safely at a roadside diner and even gives him a dime for coffee. It’s an old song. Anyway, the waitress tells him that Joe died 10 years earlier at the exact location that Joe picked him up. I know it’s just a song, but I have goosebumps. 

I guess I’m just a bit nostalgic today, remembering simpler times and wishing coffee still cost a dime. Let me know what your handle was and if you enjoyed talking on the CB radio.

Would You Go Back if You Could?

I’m in the process of filling out a memory and keepsake journal for my family. I’ve been working on it for a while because there are lots of questions and my hand gets tired. There was a particular question, What I miss most about being a child. I was stumped. I thought about the obvious answer like no responsibility, but really, did I miss being a child? And then I thought, would I go back and relive my childhood? There are definitely things I would do differently, if I could. But God gives us this one chance at life. That’s it. I’m 61 now. I’ve had a wonderful and rewarding life but face it, it’s on the downhill slide from here on out.

But If I could have a do-over knowing what I know now I hope that I would do better. I would be kinder and braver and make better choices. I would appreciate the time I spent with my family and friends more, especially the ones that have left this world. I would have tried harder, loved more.  Yeah, right.

Does anyone actually live their life to the fullest or is that just something you say. It sounds good. In reality, I would probably make all of the same decisions (and mistakes) all over again. I’d steal those balloons again, just like I did when I was 5 years old and blame it on some kids who dared me to do it. I’d still lie and say I was sick with a belly ache or wrap a thermometer up in a heated pad so my temperature would be 180 degrees just so I wouldn’t have to go to school. I’d lie through my teeth because that’s what most kids do.

I could never be perfect. If I was, I certainly wouldn’t need Jesus. He would have come for all you other poor lost souls.

Now, this day, is the time to do better. I know Jesus now and have the Holy Spirit trying His best to get me through each day. I feel convicted, for example, when I stick out my tongue at someone or mock them. This may or may not be my husband, whom I love more than words can convey.

So, I would not go back. Absolutely not. I am who I am. I did what I did, and I know what I know. I am who I am today because of my mistakes, my triumphs, and because of all of the choices I made. I am at peace, but I will also always strive to be better, do better and love more.

I will be posting a short story in the near future. Click and subscribe to my page so you won’t miss it!

Writing my first novel. Haha!

My awkward self in the 4th grade.

I think this may be when I was beginning to have a little more confidence. I looked pretty sassy in that pose.

6th grade…riding my brother’s skateboard

What was it really like Suni and Butch? I need to know!

How in the world did Suni and Butch last so long in space without pulling each other’s hair out? Suni’s hair was always floating around, just ready to be grabbed and yanked. You know it was! As a mother, I couldn’t help but be concerned about their well-being. Since I’ve become acquainted with old Mr. Arthur Itis, I’ve literally been worrying for months about how they would feel once gravity sets in. Can you just imagine? Their bodies will feel like they have tree trunks for legs. They’re not young. They will feel like I feel every morning I first put my feet on the ground, only one thousand times worse.

I have also worried about their water intake. We all know by now how important it is to stay hydrated. I don’t like to brag, but I’m incredibly lucky because we have fresh water from the spring to drink here at the farm. It’s amazing and I thank God for it. I turn my nose up at bottled water now. Who knows where it came from AND it’s been sitting in plastic! I googled what Suni and Butch had. Their water is recycled from their colleague’s sweat and exhaled breath! Did you just throw up a little in your mouth? Unknown water sources from plastic containers will be like heaven to them.

I would think food (and water) and family will be what they are looking forward to the most after being in space for 286 days. What are they dreaming of for their first meal? Is it something fresh and warm, not cold and prepackaged? Hot flavored coffees, and ice-cold drinks would definitely be on the list. I can tell you right now, my husband would be stopping at the drive-thru on the way home. I’d want a Heath Blizzard toot sweet! If it were me, I wouldn’t be able to stop hugging my family, and crying, because I’m a crier. You could bag my tears, recycle them and supply the next adventure for a whole year!

The next thing I’d do when I returned to good old Earth, if I were an astronaut, would be to color my roots. To each his own, but I wouldn’t like the entire world to see my roots showing. I have light brown hair but when my roots come in, they look like someone drew a black sharpie on my head next to my bottle blonde locks. Butch must have been cutting his hair in space. I googled that too. They have the tools they need and a vacuum for the hair that will be floating around. Did Suni help him? That seems a little personal and gross at the same time.

How in the world did they use the bathroom? I googled that and believe me, I’m not the only person that has googled these questions. Astronauts use a specially designed vacuum toilet with a suction system to manage bodily fluids, preventing waste from floating around. I’m telling you people; this is just too much! Can you imagine the smell?! If you broke wind, you couldn’t even blame it on the dog. They haven’t had a proper bath either. If it were me, I think I would have had to take a prompt dip in the ocean with those nosy nelly dolphins that came to greet them when they landed.

There are some cool things about being in space but knowing me, I would have tired of them after 10 minutes. I would have liked floating around like I was as light as a feather. I bet my saggy skin would lift oh so lightly, to turn the clock back at least five years. Mr. Google Pants said it’s sort of like being in water only you wouldn’t get the wrinkled skin.

I wonder if it’s a little bit spiritual out in space, looking at all the wonder of God’s creation and being a little closer to Jesus. Would it also be scary? Have they seen things that they don’t want to talk about? Come on Suni and Butch! Tell us the X-Files!

Now I know that Suni and Butch have to be sick to death of each other. Nobody could be together that much for that long and not feel like they want to strangle the other person to death, at least in their mind. If there was a murder in space, we would be able to watch it on every True Crime venue available. Talk about the ultimate “Snapped!” There would be all kinds of camera footage. Can you imagine Keith Morrison and his deep, poetic voice? “It was going to be a great adventure in space…or was it?” Fortunately, the only crime committed in space, thus far, is someone accessing a bank account without permission. Gasp!

Now that Suni and Butch are back home and recovering from their grand adventure, life will resume and then publishers will probably approach them, if they haven’t already. We’ll find out more about their epic expedition and they’ll save the ‘juicy’ details for their books. Of course, it may have been a bit boring so, in that case, they may have to make something up.